On social connection

Four down and two to go with our discussion of the 6 pillars of Lifestyle Medicine. Today I’ll discuss the pillar of “social connection.” In this newsletter  back in late July, I wrote about loneliness and reminded readers of former U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy’s declaration that loneliness and isolation were an urgent public health issue. In his 2023 annual report, he backed up that claim with data which included the facts that roughly half of Americans feel lonely, that being socially isolated is the health equivalent of smoking three-quarters of a pack of cigarettes per day, and many more risks, with consequences not just for the individual, but across all of society.

However, given all the assumptions about belonging and well-being, I feel it is important to address some potential misconceptions:

Solitude does not mean loneliness. Whereas loneliness is often associated with a sense of isolation and sadness—and this rarely a choice—solitude is typically chosen and is often associated with personal reflection and growth. And speaking of choices, there is the paradox (or, might I say, “oxymoron”) of social media. When used intentionally for individual or community well-being, it can be a marvelous tool. Unfortunately, many social media business models thrive on user engagement with an algorithm designed to manipulate users’ emotion or move them away from healthy relationships. The “attention marketplace” often results in the “choice architect” being someone other than the user. As such, being among people does not equal connection or happiness.

And note another misconception: introversion likewise does not equal loneliness. Many “introverts” are quite social, perhaps just more selectively than their extroverted cohorts.  (For those introverts out there, if you haven’t already read it, I’d recommend the book: Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain.)

Belonging is the felt experience within the structure of community. In a seminal paper in the field of social psychology, Baumeister and Leary posited that a sense of belonging was the primary driver of physical and emotional health. And because President Armacost has declared this academic year “The Year of Community,” let’s continue to reinforce that structure.